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April 25, 2016

I suppose in the end, the whole of life becomes an act of letting go, but what always hurts the most is not taking a moment to say goodbye - Pi


April 24, 2016

The days, they remain the same

The one person who I loved the most is dead, dead and gone

The one person who loved me the most is far far away

The parents who brought you to this world are now scared about your time here on earth

The one friend who I had for so many years just does not trust me anymore

The other friends who I had are somewhere far beyond my world

Th person whom I trusted gave me the royal fuck somewhere down the line

The place I built and cared for like a baby has forgotten me already

Those grasslands where my son and me used to walk have grown thick with fresh grass

Though the days never seemed any different, a lot has passed over time and these years have just flashed past in a blink

Do Not Cry

There was fire in his eyes, burning blue and burning bright.

There was love drooping by, whenever I would just pass by

I sat next to him that day and all was lost and all was frayed

I spoke to him, asked him, even tried all tricks

But he refused to come by

He went away, leaving me alive, he went away, killing all inside

He, my boy, play well, eat hard and sleep tight, all that is yours and you do not have to cry

The Lost Boy

There are no more tales to be told. There is no one point in the sky that I can look upto to and wonder what has happened. The earth has just moved on as it usually does and left with nothing behind. The earth just moves on.

Men in their selfish moves make the move of their lifetimes and look back expecting applause or fearing contempt and then that man also moves on. What was here a hundred years ago is no longer present now. What was he a hundred years ago might just be a bag of bones or maybe not even that.

Men move on though they have a choice not to. They move on because they say that they must. But some men don't. They stay there, soul imprinted on that minute and that second where life had for once lasted longer than a second. They decide to stay there and remain there till the earth has moved too far ahead for them to catch on. Their bodies do the universal twist but the soul stays on. Who said it cannot be done. Who says one life in a 100 billion is irrelevant, who says anything about anyone is right or wrong. The men who stay put but their bodies move on lose the sense of attachment, they are now detached. They are nobody and nothing touches them. Everything must be shallow but the water floods them. Who says that you cannot stay on. You can move on or you can stay on. Or maybe, you can do both. The soul stays and the body moves.

One life can touch a hundred maybe a thousand maybe a million. But that one life still touches someone deeply, does it now. There is no need to feel pained by the lost moves you never made, by the lost promotions you never got, by the lost raises that never came your way, by the lost words you could not utter, by the lost wind that got sucked out from your lungs, by that lost boy who is no longer with you. The lost boy will see to it that for every moment in your waking world, where you talk and run and walk and eat, he will be over you, above you, alongside and not care a hoot with what others think. You be best happy when with him, not really a need to sucker upto to humans, is there, your boy was all you had and he is all you got, the last remaining bits of him. The twain shall meet and the strings will tie and then in this world of humans, you will be just a statistic passed.

April 16, 2016

Where are you boy...what are you doing...what are you eating...where are you.......

I miss you so much, yesterday in the dream - you kept on coming back. I had locked you in a room and somehow you came out, through a drain, through something.

Why did you do this, why were you selfish.... How did you die.. what happened to you.... was it painless... was it poison... why in that position, the position that you love so much, what did yoou think before dying.... why did you make those two sounds... why now when you were still young.... why did you have to go.

Siddu, why does god not send me to you fast.. I never loved anyone more than you... I never really loved anyone, even with you it came in phases.... where are you kid